Peace....... and other stuff!
In the middle of madness I write this..... the usual Christmas busyness/madness (even though I do love it.... most of it!) horrendous manic madness here at work..... no time to stop, apart from flopping into bed and then ending up awake for most of the night - yes, I'm sorry, this is a bit of a moan - just a bit.
We had a 24 hr prayer at the corps last week and I had a slot (albeit an hour before going into work Fri) that I was really looking forward to. I ended up awake most of the night in more pain than usual and just couldn't get to my slot. I felt cheated.... maybe I should have made myself get down to the hall - probably I should have - I know there are other times I could get down to the prayer room but I am very time poor..... and have always had problems coping with day to day stuff when I haven't slept. Trouble is, if I don't find a slot and stick to it then I won't get there. Yes I know I can pray at home (and at work when in early) and I do.... but there is the threat of being interrupted and there are always distractions - I am never on my own for very long. How can I Be Still (and know His Peace) and pray properly, when life is like this??
I am not the only one I know..... and its also something to do with this busy time of year - but how much more important it is when things are so very busy to find and make the time. My state of mind tells me the truth of this, let alone the state of my body - yes, I know, I'm getting old.... but I don't want to settle for how I am feeling.
I've blogged on this before - maybe the Holy Spirt is trying to tell me something - I know He is........
Big problem for me is that when I am 'still' even for a short time, my mind is flooded with stuff.... little and big worries..... my 'to do' list...... Dick's health/lack of health and the "what ifs" associated with that - where I am spiritually, where I should be.....family stuff and so on.... and I am reminded as I type this that my Lord said "Come unto me all ye who are heavy laden and I will give you rest" - I must come to him.
I need him every hour, every minute............ and thank him for his overwhelming love and faithfulness.
On a completely random note - The star guided the wisemen to Jesus........ what sort of star am I..... one that is blinking on and off, one that is shining bright, one that is fading, one that is twinkling... one that is moving forward.... told you it was random - just came to me! Off to visit a friend now who is terminally ill and who shines for Jesus - she is truly a star that is shining bright and pointing the way to Jesus and I am well blessed by him when I am with her.... then off to my first Christmas lunch with ex-colleagues and old friends....... then, this eve, Lucy and I are off to the Hippodrome to see Mama Mia - I was given two tickets £37 each for free!!
We had a 24 hr prayer at the corps last week and I had a slot (albeit an hour before going into work Fri) that I was really looking forward to. I ended up awake most of the night in more pain than usual and just couldn't get to my slot. I felt cheated.... maybe I should have made myself get down to the hall - probably I should have - I know there are other times I could get down to the prayer room but I am very time poor..... and have always had problems coping with day to day stuff when I haven't slept. Trouble is, if I don't find a slot and stick to it then I won't get there. Yes I know I can pray at home (and at work when in early) and I do.... but there is the threat of being interrupted and there are always distractions - I am never on my own for very long. How can I Be Still (and know His Peace) and pray properly, when life is like this??
I am not the only one I know..... and its also something to do with this busy time of year - but how much more important it is when things are so very busy to find and make the time. My state of mind tells me the truth of this, let alone the state of my body - yes, I know, I'm getting old.... but I don't want to settle for how I am feeling.
I've blogged on this before - maybe the Holy Spirt is trying to tell me something - I know He is........
Big problem for me is that when I am 'still' even for a short time, my mind is flooded with stuff.... little and big worries..... my 'to do' list...... Dick's health/lack of health and the "what ifs" associated with that - where I am spiritually, where I should be.....family stuff and so on.... and I am reminded as I type this that my Lord said "Come unto me all ye who are heavy laden and I will give you rest" - I must come to him.
I need him every hour, every minute............ and thank him for his overwhelming love and faithfulness.
On a completely random note - The star guided the wisemen to Jesus........ what sort of star am I..... one that is blinking on and off, one that is shining bright, one that is fading, one that is twinkling... one that is moving forward.... told you it was random - just came to me! Off to visit a friend now who is terminally ill and who shines for Jesus - she is truly a star that is shining bright and pointing the way to Jesus and I am well blessed by him when I am with her.... then off to my first Christmas lunch with ex-colleagues and old friends....... then, this eve, Lucy and I are off to the Hippodrome to see Mama Mia - I was given two tickets £37 each for free!!
posted by Ann at 10:52 am
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