Psalm 139

Psalm 139

1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.

4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.

5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,

10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,"

12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!

18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.

19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!

20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.

21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD,
and abhor those who rise up against you?

22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.

24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

Psalm 18 (first 2 verses)

1 I love you, O LORD, my strength.

2 The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer;
my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge.
He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

Psalm 27

1 The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?

2 When evil men advance against me
to devour my flesh,
when my enemies and my foes attack me,
they will stumble and fall.

3 Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then will I be confident.

4 One thing I ask of the LORD,
this is what I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD
and to seek him in his temple.

5 For in the day of trouble
he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle
and set me high upon a rock.

6 Then my head will be exalted
above the enemies who surround me;
at his tabernacle will I sacrifice with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make music to the LORD.

7 Hear my voice when I call, O LORD;
be merciful to me and answer me.

8 My heart says of you, "Seek his face!"
Your face, LORD, I will seek.

9 Do not hide your face from me,
do not turn your servant away in anger;
you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
O God my Savior.

10 Though my father and mother forsake me,
the LORD will receive me.

11 Teach me your way, O LORD;
lead me in a straight path
because of my oppressors.

12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
for false witnesses rise up against me,
breathing out violence.

13 I am still confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.

14 (I will) Wait for the LORD;
(He will help me to) be strong and take heart
and (I WILL) wait for the LORD.

Protection

Those who know my husband well will know he is one of the least racist people there is. I say this as a prelude to what I want to blog about here.... hoping that no-one gets the wrong impression!

Dick was on his way home the other evening after work (7pmish) and as he drove away from the Casualty set he almost ended up having the front of our car smashed to bits by a speeding taxi who just managed to pull up with a screech of tires, stopping inches from Dick. As you might imagine, Dick was rather shocked at this and it showed in his face and in him throwing up his hands - He assures me there was no other hand or finger gestures. Anyway the taxi guy (asian) got out of the taxi (he had 2 asian passengers) and started walking to Dick shouting and remonstrating wildly "what the f*** are you looking at you B******" etc.... Dick got out of the car and explained that the reason he had looked at the guy was due to the shock of nearly being hit! During this interjection two other cars came screaming to a halt behind the taxi..... each had 4 asians in (it certainly looked like they had been racing). At this point Dick realised that the situation could possibly turn nasty as he was now well outnumbered. He turned to walk back to the car and as he started to get in the taxi driver shouted "you f****** white trash"

I am posting this to again demonstrate yet again the faithfulness of God..... I know He protected Dick in that situation as I had prayed for Dick's protection earlier in the day.... the whole incident was quite strange to Dick on many levels - but particularly the fact that, even though there were so many against one person - no physical violence occurred and I again praise God yet again because I know that the stress caused in such a situation, for Dick with his heart probs, could easily have proved fatal.

I am becoming increasingly aware of the devil looking to devour, kill & steal...... and of the fact that, at this point in time, Dick has not recognised his need of Christ as his Saviour - and therefore urgency of my commission.

In Christ alone

Wherever He leads me........... Whatever He wants me to do........ Whoever He has called me to be.......... although I may struggle on a human level with working out my Salvation with fear and trembling - this is my testimony:

In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light my strength my song
This Cornerstone this solid Ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love what depths of peace
When fears are stilled when strivings cease
My Comforter my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand

In Christ alone - who took on flesh
Fullness of God in helpless babe
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones He came to save
Till on that cross as Jesus died
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid
Here in the death of Christ I live

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave He rose again
And as He stands in Victory
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt in life no fear in death
This is the Power of Christ in me
From life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
Till He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand

(thanks to Stuart Townend)

PS: Dick and I sorted out our Wills yesterday.... in mine I've stated that this is one of the songs I want at my thanksgiving service - so I reiterate it all but esp the last verse... mind you, I think I need to work on the first two words of that verse!

fellowship, community...

Should I 'enjoy' going to my corps - should I be getting anything in particular out of my attendance for me, selfish individual that I tend to be??

What I am blessed by and receive in my corps setting... thats probably a better way to put it, is: Good, uplifting worship and deep thought-provoking teaching. To be honest, that is it. Maybe that is all that I should be going there for.... equipping for the day to day fight and so on. And yes, I recognise I have a part to play in this - I'm not the most naturally gifted people when it comes to the general chit-chatter of the fellowship but my limited patience seems to be even more limited at the moment - To be honest, I believe that I display the fruits of the Holy Spirit more when I am not at the corps - and that says a lot about me (and the corps) - but what!

Is my expectation too high? Am I in the wrong place? Is it something more? How can I keep on keeping on when I feel so frustrated.

I am not about to leave........ no-one has said or done anything enough to make me leave........ I do still believe that I am called to be a Soldier in His Army........ but I know I am either not doing what He has called me to be..... or I am doing what He hasn't called me to be.

But, I feel like screaming..................... maybe I just need a holiday :) maybe I just need to be listening to Him more - perhaps I should just Be Still and Know that He is God!